In the culinary world, three is also a magical number. Here?s where the harmonic convergence of flavors, textures and aromas can feed off one and other. Three wisely chosen ingredients can create taste sensations that truly are greater than the sum of their parts, yet less involved, less expensive and less time-consuming than infinitely more complicated dishes. And the best news is that with fewer ingredients and fewer steps, you?ll have more time for your love triangle. Now if that genie would just respond to your text messages.

Here is a succulent, sensuous, trilogy of foolproof three-ingredient recipes.

Cocktail Dates
(yields 12 bites)

In their unadorned state, Medjool dates are nicknamed ?nature?s candy?. Stuff these babies with the nuttiness of Parmigiano-Reggiano, wrap them in the smoky saltiness of bacon, and bake them, and they will turn into molten balls of decadence that will explode in your mouth and blow your mind.

12 large dried Medjool dates
6 slices bacon, cut in half
4 oz. chunk Italian Parmigiano-Reggiano

Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit

Slice date from top to bottom as deep as the pit. Pry open date and remove pit. Reserve dates.

Using your sharpest knife, cut Parmigiano-Reggiano into pieces that are just slightly larger than the pit you have just removed. Place cheese where the pit was and pinch the date around the cheese to seal.

Wrap each Parmigiano-stuffed date with a slice of bacon. Set dates on a baking sheet, seam-side down, and skewer with a toothpick to hold bacon in place.

Bake for approximately 20 minutes, or until bacon is crispy. Caution: Let cool for a few minutes before serving.

Maple Salmon Suckers
(yields 12 suckers)

This savory sucker comes with the Surreal Gourmet?s money back guarantee. If you are not completely satisfied, we?ll refund the purchase price and transfer an undisclosed sum from the estranged wife of a deported Nigerian business tycoon directly into your bank account. Simply forward us your banking details.

1 1/2 lbs. salmon fillet, preferably wild (select thickest fillet available)
3/4 cup maple syrup
1/4 cup soy sauce
2 T coarsely grated black pepper (I consider pepper a condiment rather than an ingredient. If you disagree, feel free to contact my attorney)

Slice salmon into 1/4-inch-thick strips.

Place salmon slices in a resealable plastic bag along with syrup and soy. Force out the air and seal. Marinate in the refrigerator for a minimum of 4 hours, but ideally for 24 hours.

At the same time, soak 12 bamboo skewers in water (resealable plastic bags work well for this task too).

Preheat grill or broiler to high heat.

Remove salmon from marinade and skewer from the wide end.

Place pepper on a small plate and dip one edge of the salmon in it.

Grill salmon on a well-oiled BBQ grate over direct heat, or directly under a broiler for 1 minute per side, or until just cooked throughout, yet still moist. Serve immediately, or suffer the consequence of the fish drying out.

Bee Stings
(yields 12 bites)

The pigs, cows, and bees have done all the heavy lifting, making this the least amount of effort you will ever have to expend for the greatest amount of accolades.

1/4 cup best-available honey
1/2 T white truffle oil
6 oz. block Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese

In a small bowl, combine honey, truffle oil, and pepper. Reserve.

Just before serving, use a paring knife to chisel cheese into irregular 1/2-inch nuggets. Drizzle truffled honey over each nugget. For added savoryness, finish with freshly ground black pepper

(To get the most Parmigiano-Reggiano for your buck, look for rindless center cuts. For the freshest Parmigiano-Reggiano, purchase from stores that move a lot of it.)

Going against the better advice of my high school English and sex education teachers, this story starts with the climax. For anyone involved in wine, the three months from the end of August until the end of November are both the most exciting and the most frightening of the year. These three months dictate the final say in whether you happily learn that your wines will be served at the White House or whether you become the largest vinegar producer in your neighborhood. These are months of 60- to 80-hour work weeks (and many times more) that on one hand require complete control of the environment around you and on the other hand require you to give in completely to the whims of nature. These are months where all thoughts of family and friends dim in an ever growing purple haze as your sleep deprived mind attempts to reconcile the hundreds or thousands of details that'll make or break the next year of your life. This is Crush.

More specifically this is my accounting of Crush for David Coffaro Vineyards and Winery. This vineyard/winery is owned and operated by (take a big guess here) David Coffaro and I'm his assistant winemaker (i.e. only employee). This is the inside scoop of what we have to do in order to put a prime bottle of vino on your table. David Coffaro Vineyard and Winery consists of 20 acres of grapes that Dave planted in 1979 and a winery building that he's been operating since 1994. We make wines that are big and red; zinfandel, petite sirah, carignane, an "Estate Cuvee" (a blend of the previous grapes plus cabernet sauvignon) and a "Neighbors Cuvee" (our only non-estate wine whose blend changes from year to year). Like a sandblaster to Tammy Faye Baker's face, I hope to strip away the layers of overglamorized marketing rhetoric and highlight the best advice I ever got about becoming a winemaker -- "Don't do it!"

The excitement of crush takes place on two separate but intertwined stages that seem to spin and twist in independent motion. The first of these stages is the vineyard. The 20 acres of vines we grow is minuscule by industry standards (There are certainly vineyards that are smaller but we are definitely of the side of pretty-darn-tiny). The first job we have in the vineyard is to wait for the grapes to turn from a rather pretty translucent pink color into an intense dark purple/black color. This process is called veraison. Once the color changes we're in the picking ballpark and ready to play the game. The second step is doing a large amount of grape sampling from each block of vines. It's amazing how grapes will vary from one small block to another, even if they're only 10-100 feet away. For about a month before the actual harvest, my job is to pick a representative sampling of all the grapes we grow and monitor them for sugar content. In general we're looking for a level of 24 to 25 percent sugar, which we measure as 24 to 25 degrees Brix.

The Brix reading is only the second